When I Said, Yes…
When I said yes to God, I had no idea what that meant. When I said yes to ministry, I had no idea how to serve. When I said yes to Haiti, I had no idea how my life would change. That’s the funny thing about obedience, when we say yes to God (and mean it) we never know what could happen next. God doesn’t force us to do anything, that’s the beauty of free will. But he does command us to obedience and when we say yes, nothing remains the same. That’s why we need faith.
When I said yes to Haiti….
- I had never seen a child with naturally orange hair due to malnourishment
- I had never heard of creole
- I had never cried over people I didn’t know
- I had never been sunburnt
- I had never been exhausted and not known why
- I had never given my everything knowing I would get nothing back
- I’d never been without water, air conditioning or electricity in my home
- I’d never known a bigger unknown.
Now I know these things, and more.
That’s the funny thing about obedience. When I said yes, I never thought my heart would break in the ways that it has. I never imagined the hurt I would see. I never thought the guaranteed things from my life would become rare blessings.
Before I Said, Yes…
Before I said yes to Haiti
- I had never known what peace felt like
- I had never prayed expectantly, knowing that lives could depend on answered prayers (and seen those prayers answered so clearly)
- I had never laughed until I cried
- I had never loved someone who I couldn’t talk to
- I had never learned a new language
- I had never seen a kid take their first steps
- I had never seen joy
- I had never known how to live simply
- I had no plans of a college degree
- I’d never lived apart from my family
- I had never watched a toddler learn my name and say it for the first time
- I’d never ridden in a tap tap
- I’d never been to the Caribbean
- I’d never bought something outside of the supermarket
- I didn’t love cold showers
- I didn’t love the heat
- I didn’t know that sour oranges existed only for cleaning your food
- I didn’t know what a goat sounded like
- I’d never showered in the rain
- I’d never been vulnerable
- I’d never been dependent on others, and had them dependent on me
- I’d never had a purpose that felt meaningful.
- I’d never known a bigger unknown
Now I know these things, and so much more.
That’s the funny thing about obedience.
Yes, means, Yes…
When your yes means yes and you let Jesus take the wheel, you never know what you might experience. When I said yes, I was greeted with some of the hardest, and the most incredible, awe-inspiring things. I’ve laughed harder and cried harder. I’ve loved deeper and grown in every way. Had I not said yes to Haiti, I wouldn’t be the person I am now. I cannot imagine what would have happened if I’d ignored God when he called me to Haiti.
What is God calling you to? Is it scary? Yes. Will it be worth it? Obedience always is. What would happen if you said yes to that thing the Lord has asked of you?